Setting: Morning Star Meadows Farm, ram’s pen, top corner
It’s pretty much any hour of the day (unless it’s chow time), and the rams are keeping vigil of their precious ewes in a nearby pasture, gazing at them longingly.
Background music: Standing on the Corner, Watching all the Girls Go By
BOOMER: Hey, Drover…Dude… I’ve got my eye on Fatima, Millie and Molly…how about you?
DROVER: Well, Boomer my boy, Millie’s my mom and Fatima’s my twin sister, so they’re all yours. And ya better treat ’em right! We may have a fight on our hooves, though, over Molly. But non-negotiable “mine” are Bruna, your twin sister, Shirley and Daisy, your half sisters, and Roxanne. She and I were an item last fall, if you remember. Nice twins we made together!
BOOMER: Well, after I finish chewing this dang cud, you and I may have to have a tussle or two over Molly. She was my one and only last year. Anyway, my horns need some realignment, and butting heads is good for the soul — makes you know you’re alive, know what I mean?
DROVER: Yeah, Boomer. Not sure why it feels so good to run at you full force and bang foreheads, but we keep doing it – and those humans keep telling us not to! Just can’t figure it out! Must be this time of year when it gets cooler and the leaves start falling. Maybe it’s something in those leaves we’ve been nibbling?
BOOMER: I don’t know. The shepherd keeps saying to everyone we’re “feeling our oats” but I haven’t had oats my whole life so I don’t know what he’s talking about!
Hey! At least Monty’s not here any more to tell us what to do!
DROVER: No kidding! Hurry up and finish your cud! My headache’s nearly gone now…I’m not seeing double any more, so I think I can hit you on the first go!
And so the sun sets on another episode of “Days of Our Ruminants”